My dear Stanleys,
I recently posted on FB that over the last 15 months, I’ve been working on contentment. I believe that my lack of it is my biggest problem in life. The root cause, per se, of frustration, sadness, and anger. Some can ride in the middle of the road between ambition and contentment, but I cannot. I am one or the other and ambition only makes me all about getting more, being more, and having more.
They say the first step is acknowledging the problem.
I’ve known for a long time that my ambition makes me blind to others that I love. It makes me singularly focused on me and me only.
It makes me want to alter myself : my body outside of exercise and diet, my clothing when I cannot afford it, my job when I should be thankful, my activities when I am right where I should be. I am never satisfied.
Can anyone relate?
Well, here’s what I’ve learned about contentment.
Contentment is not about being happy with what I have. Oh no, it’s about accepting who God believes I am in His name.
And contentment does not end the working. It’s just that now I work to live my belief in His love for me.
See, I am the daughter of the one true King. My Father sent my Brother to die on the cross for me (Hebrews 2). For my blind ambition. For my insane need for recognition. For my desire to make my body different than the Image and Likeness it matches in Heaven. For my feelings of inadequacy that cause me to buy things I will never wear or use. Yes, Jesus died for all of that. For all of that and many more things I dare not mention but to Him.
And, as I like to simplify things to make them easier for my life, here’s what that means:
1) I must work to nurture my most important relationships (John 13:35)
with my Savior : Daily study, prayer and dependence. He is my strength, my shield, and my stronghold. (Psalm 18)
with my Husband : Encourage him, thank him and care for him. Be proud to be his wife even when the world tells me not to be. Put my shoes, my laundry, and the blue potholders away everyday.
with my Molly : Be kind. Stop my busy day to read books or play games. Teach her about Jesus and about how He loves her. Sing and dance.
with my sister, Emily : Emily and I have had some rocky roads over these 40 years, but I love her. And as our Dad’s days grow shorter, we will be all we have left. And she’s a cool chick too so I need to call more, visit more, encourage more.
with my Jodi : Jodi is a friend that I can not talk to for months and we pick up where we leave off.
Like Emily, she needs more calls, more visits and more encouragement. She feeds my soul when we’re together and that is rare to find in a friend. She is my longest real relationship outside of my family and for that I am thankful.
With my sisters from a Heavenly Mister : Lizzie, Deena, Rachel, Amy, Annie, Emily and Erin are so very special to me. I am not typically a girl’s girl when it comes to friendships but I fit with these ladies. I love them all more than they could ever know.
With my lovely mentors (Titus 2) : Linda, Judy, Debby, Pam X 2, Donna, Laura, Karen, JoAn… I mean there are so many that I cannot mention them all. They have stepped in and helped me through so many things. But God sends you many Moms when yours goes to Heaven. How blessed am I?
with other DS Families : The Hissetts, the Barlows, the Millers, the Thornberries, etc etc : They understand the struggles and joys of Down Syndrome and we lean on each other daily.
2) I must love my body and self as He created me (Genesis 1:27)
Exercise and eat right to bring out the strength He designed into my muscles and bones. (Hebrews 12:1)
Quit changing, or plotting to change my appearance. I am made in His image and likeness and that’s perfection. This is a tough one.
No more dreaming of plastic surgery.
Giving up the hair coloring and being proud of the situations that give me “glitter hair”.
Minimizing the make-up. I want His radiance to shine through.
Nail polish. Well, just pray for me on this one. It will be a big struggle. I feel pretty with polish.
3) Work hard at all I do (Proverbs 14:23)
Give my best at T every day. Keep a positive attitude for my boss and my team.
Finish what I start, whether it’s at home, work or in ministry.
Prepare for my Sundays with littles. Pray over the lesson and them so they see a little Jesus in me.
I want to do all of this, again, so His radiance shines through me. I want people that I encounter to encounter Him.
I want young women and girls that know me to know that the body God gave them is perfect.
For them to see me in a loving marriage and realizing that real love in a real marriage is about our faith in Him and each other, no matter what. That the real romance novel marriage is when your husband thinks enough to clean your bathroom because you have no time to do so. When he makes a covert trip to Kroger to buy taco fixings because he knows that will make you happy after a rough day. One who tells you to go get in your flannels so you are more comfortable.
And I want them to see me working hard and succeeding because God blesses me and they can do the same.
This contentment thing is going to be journey that I will be on for quite some time. I’ll never be an expert. But that’s kind of the point. God will remind me daily who I am in Him if I only hold fast to Him.
“But you are to cling to the LORD your God, as you have done to this day.” Joshua 23:8
I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:11-13
keepitsimplestanley 